Grades

I just woke up. Starting the day right by blogging it up for the first time in a while. It's one of the first mornings I've had in a while without finals, work, church, conferences, or the the dire need to sleep. Basically, it's a good morning. I finally got all my semester grades up on the John Jay website, and the end result, as some of you know, was A, A, A, A-, C+. Which one is not like the others? The C+. Surprisingly, however, I was not as upset about that C+ as I was about the A-. You see, the A- I received in a class in which the teacher promised me an A. The majority of that sociology class was spent watching movies relevant to the subject matter. This included American History X, Monster, Crash, and some lesser-known films... but anyway, on the first day of class I volunteered to help out with setting up these movies. So the grade for the class consisted of 2 essays, attendance and participation. That's it. I only missed about 3 classes max ('cause it was in the middle of the day, not my first morning class), I clearly participated a lot and I got an A- on the first essay. When she gave that essay back she told me  I had the highest grade in the class and that it was the best written one (duh). A few days before the last essay was due she told me I was guaranteed an A in the class and that as a result of my good work and for helping her out with the movies I didn't have to do the final essay. Okay. So from the professor's own mouth I was told that I was guaranteed an A (not an A-).

Flash forward to my grades being posted online, and I do NOT have an A in her class, but an A-. Had I known that she was doing so I would have done the last essay. I don't know if in her mind an A and A- are the same thing.... and normally I am completely satisfied with an A-, but the fact that she guaranteed and promised me an A makes the A- sting more than The Police. I'm not as upset about the C+ because that teacher is legitimately a moron. That class, Research Methods, is one of two required courses. For most majors you have a choice of Statistics or Research Methods, and being as I hate math I decided to give research a whirl (for some majors you actually need both classes, but that's unimportant). First day of class, the teacher (and I will always refer to her as a teacher, as she is not worthy of the title "professor"), walks in 10 minutes late - a pattern she followed throughout the entire semester - and the first thing she tells us in her pubescent boyish voice with her thick Turkish accent is "most people find this class very boring and the material is very dry." I almost walked out right then. How the Hell are we supposed to take a class seriously if on the first day the instructor tells us it sucks? It's ridiculous they require a course like this... We spent the semester listening to her talk about bull crap that had nothing to do with anything. She did teach us what an independent variable was, but I learned that in 5th grade! I remember learning it! We never got a legit syllabus... We only got a sheet with her contact information and a little outline on the course. Nothing about tests, grades, and dates. The class before the midterm she announces for the first time that the next class we will have our midterm and it will be on everything we've learned so far! Everyone starts yelling, and saying things like "WTF?!" "This isn't fair," "What's it on?"... and meanwhile I'm sitting in my regular seat in the back corner of the classroom and simply raise my hand... When she calls on me I ask everyone to quiet down and I ask her,

"Professor, how do you expect us to react when you come into class 10 minutes late and announce that the next class will be our midterm? How do you even expect us to take it seriously when on the first day of class you told us the material is very dry and most people hate the class? And better yet, how do you come in the day before a test and tell us we're having a test on everything we've learned so far when you legitimately have not taught us anything? It's easy for you to say that as the one giving the grades, but we are the ones getting graded! We are the ones whose grades are affected by your lack of good teaching. So can you please teach us something so we can actually be graded on something?"

At this point some of the kids started jokingly clapping and cheering, but I was like, "No, stop... I'm serious, I'm not trying to start a problem, I'm trying to help us out." Anyway, the teacher spent the rest of the class going through what was on the midterm. None of what she taught was on the midterm. And no, what I said was not mean. Some people need to hear it. I think the fact that someone like her is even allowed to teach in a college is ridiculous, and I'm not afraid to let them hear it. I'm not afraid to start controversy, and I do it while being respectful, if the situation calls for it. That's why I'm not mad about the C+ because I think it reflects heavily on her... If I get straight As and one C+, that says something in my opinion...
The best part of this story? At the end of the semester it is legally required for all professors to give out instructor evaluation sheets... The grading system where you answer questions pertaining to every professor and give them a number grade from 1 - 5. I would have given her all zeroes had she given it out to our class. I told her on the last day of class. I said "Professor, listen. It is no secret that I am no fan of your teaching style because I have taken absolutely nothing from this class and I think you have taught us nothing, but that is my problem. As a student I have the legal right to offer my opinions, but you have not given us the evaluation forms which you are legally obligated to give out to every class and THAT is not fair. I am entitled to evaluate your teaching method or lack thereof." Her response? Once again, in her thickly-accented English "I sorry! I check my mailbox every day but I never got it! I know I have to give but there was nothing." That is almost word-for-word what she said. I almost laughed in her face. I said "That is not an excuse. I think you're scared of how we will evaluate you so you 'forgot' to give us the evaluations. And I don't think any student should ever have to go through this class again if you are the one teaching it, because I think your teaching methods are detrimental to our collegiate learning." That was the last thing I said to her, as I turned around and walked out. At the start of next semester I am going to bring this situation to the ears of the upper-ups. And I do know enough people of some power in the school well enough to actually do something about it. I think it's ridiculous she ever got her PhD. I'm not even sure if she has it... And like I said, I don't care about my grade. That's done with. I still got a 3.6 GPA for the term despite the C+... I just don't think other people should have to suffer through her excuse of a class because she's an idiot, and I can probably do something about it.

The Best Thing I've Ever Written

Greetings, boys, girls, and Gagas!

Today I had to hand in my final portfolio for poetry class, which included a brand new poem that my Professor will read for the first time, only one time. This is what I wrote, and I must say I am rather proud of it:



Silence.

I got high when I first saw you, right away I started panickin’,
Then everything was silent. My heart froze like a mannequin

And I became your plastic flesh, wearing all your outfits.
I succumbed to your abuse. I became your Auschwitz.

But I was never anguished, living by your rule.
I lived for that desire, I ached to be your tool!

But you could never have it… breathing my every breath.
Having me was Heaven, loving me was death.

Killing me was golden, that’s what you told your ladies…
And even though I never sinned, I’ll still wait for you in Hades.

My Sestina Poem For My Poetry Final

For those who don't know, a sestina is a type of poem where you have six six-line stanzas, where the end words are repeated in a certain order in each one... and the seventh stanza is 3 lines, with those words being in the middle and end of the line in a certain order as well. Well, here is the one I wrote:

Vandals

I saw our names in aged graffiti –
Faded feelings, watered bricks.
They’re scratched away but last forever –
Engraved like colorful memories.
And people say we are vandals,
That’s just the word out on the street…

It was not a dirty street,
But they want to cover our graffiti.
Wouldn’t that make them the vandals?
Wouldn’t they be throwing bricks?
Whatever anybody does, we still have our memories
Even without any colors, our spot is set forever.

Yes, we’ll bring these walls to life forever!
Parading anguish down the street,
Our pain will live on in our memories,
Our fanfare felt in that graffiti –
Our colors instilled in those bricks
Because we bleed the blood of vandals.

This Petri love we share – like vandals –
May grow up tarnished and be loathed; then forever
We’ll be stuck, laying down bricks
Upon Heaven’s street.
And God will draw his own graffiti,
Become a part of our memories…

Hate will define our memories.
Like the apple and the first two vandals
We’ll be kicked out for our graffiti –
Like They paid by living scared forever,
For losing faith upon God’s street…
God carried a cross, we carry bricks.

I’ve never held such heavy bricks.
We’ve never had such memories.
We’ve never crawled upon God’s street,
But in our dreams we have been vandals:
Knocked down walls put up to last forever,
And tore down our very own graffiti.

This is our street, we are the vandals
We’ll build bricks like memories
And we will die some day, forever. Faded names in graffiti.

Letting the creative juices flow... (How gay and sexual does that sound?)

I am under the impression that the Switchfoot song "I Dare You To Move" was written after a long game of chess between the singer and someone else. They were probably stuck in a stalemate for a long time, one of the two slowly pondering his next move before the other shouted out "I dare you to move!" Yes. That's definitely what happened.

While I'm in the writing mood, I'd also like to talk about something that's been on my mind for at least two weeks now, because I hear it everywhere I go.... Christmas carols. They're everywhere! It doesn't help I work at a clothing store, but still... They should create a law that makes it illegal to play Christmas songs on the radio any earlier than two weeks before Christmas and up to New Years. Otherwise, by Christmas everyone is sick of them (or at least I am... and that's all that matters). Alright, in reality carols are not that big a deal, but people should at least change it up once in a while, and create new ones. I know The Killers did a Christmas song a few years back that was good and much different from the classics. No Doubt's version of Oi To The World is also a great one. What I REALLY have a problem with, however, is the lyrics in all these songs. Oi To The World is creative, funny, Christmasy and awesome. It's about an Indian boy named Haji who gets beat up by skinhead Trevor at a bar and they chase each other around and at the end they hug it out (Bitch?) and have drinks at the pub together. Classic. Isn't that what Christmas is really about? (Tongue-in-cheek, all you by-the-book people out there). That's creative. What bothers me is why (as I've already mentioned on Facebook) we sing slaying songs on Christmas? And we have fun slaying people?!?! "How fun it is to ride and sing a slaying song tonight!" So we're not slaying people, just singing about it! And we're riding a winter roller coaster or something while we do it? It's crazy.

Furthermore, what in the bloody Hell is a jingle horse? I have never been able to figure that out. "Giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet." First of all, if a horse (and I'm basing this point on the assumption that a jingle horse is, in fact, either a breed of - or something very similar to - a typical equine) picks up its feet, then wouldn't it just lie there in the snow, uselessly. I mean, yes, it will theoretically float for the tiniest fraction of millisecond, but after that all four legs would hit the ground and the jingle horse's knees would probably snap or something... Alright, and now let's work on the assumption that a jingle horse is actually a horse with jingles on it. With that in mind, the lyrics still do not make any sense. If a person is wearing clothes, you do not call him a clothes person. What idiot wrote this?... Stupid lyricist, could have made a lot more sense if they lyrics were "giddy-up, horse-with-bells, run really fast... riding around the block." (or however that line goes). Ridiculous.

But wait, there's more! You'd think people were bad enough, singing slaying songs, but no... that's not enough. They also have to sing about whores. "Oh what fun it is to ride on a one whore-soaping sleigh." Not only are they "riding a whore" (if that's what we call it nowadays), but the whore is covered in soap! ...or at least the sleigh the whore is on is covered in soap. Makes no sense. This is what the kids listen to today? No thank you. Here's a real Christmas song:

Oi To The World.

Genius lyrics... originally by The Vandals, popularized by No Doubt.
This is the best Christmas song you'll ever hear.... (for those who don't know, Oi is a form of punk rock meant to unify skinheads and punks and everyone...)



Haji was a punk just like any other boy
And he never had no trouble till he started up his Oi band
Safe in the garage or singing in the tub
Till Haji went too far and he plugged in at the pub

'Twas a cold Christmas eve when Trevor and the skins
Popped in for a pint and to nick a bag of crisps
Trevor liked the music but not the Unity
He unwound Haji's turban and he knocked him to his knees

If God came down on Christmas Day
I know exactly what He'd say
He'd say "Oi to the punks and Oi to the skins
and Oi to the world and everybody wins!"

Haji was a bloody mess, he ran out through the crowd
he said "we'll meet again we are bloody yet unbowed"
Trevor called his bluff and told him where to meet
Christmas day on the roof down at 20 Oxford street

If God came down on Christmas Day
I know exactly what He'd say
He'd say "Oi to the punks and Oi to the skins
and Oi to the world and everybody wins!"

On the roof with the nun chucks Trevor broke a lot of bones
But Haji had a sword like the guy in Indiana Jones

Police sirens wailing, a bloody dying man
Haji was alone and abandoned by his band
Trevor was there fading and still so full of hate
When the skins left him there and went down the fire escape
Oi! Oi!

But then Haji saw the north star shining more than ever
So he made a tourniquet from his turban saving Trevor
They rappelled down the roof with the rest of the turban
and went back to the pub where they bought each other bourbon

If God came down on Christmas Day
I know exactly what He'd say
He'd say "Oi to the punks and Oi to the skins
and Oi to the world and everybody wins!"

Olsen Twins (AKA I know way too much about Full House)

What ever happened to the Olsen Twins? I mean really! They were the hype! They were awesome in Full House, where they became stars, and then they had like 5 awesome movies and then once they turned 16 - nothing. I know MaryKate became anorexic or something, but just because she's skinny does that mean she disappeared completely (I know she does when she turns sideways, but seriously!). They should do like a Full House remake or something... Something along the lines of "All Grown Up," the Rugrats remake where they're all older. That'd be awesome! And in the Full House remake they actually have both twins appear instead of just one at a time! Ha! And Bob Saget should be the same Bob Saget that is portrayed in Entourage... the crazy, cracked-out sex addict. John Stamos would still be the same badass John Stamos... Uncle Joey (come on, anyone seriously know/care about his real name?) is probably 60 by now, but he'd be the same funny, cross-eyed dude. Jodi Sweetin became some alcoholic, and they could feature that in the new version. Candace Cameron went from fat teen-aged DJ to the hot blond wife of Russian NHL player Valeri Bure. He could make some great cameos. They don't really need to include the weird neighbor, Kimmy. No one cares about her. She was pretty useless and annoying. I think that pretty much covers it. Anyway, all I'm really trying to say is I want to know what the heck happened to the Olsen Twins?

Asians...

Like I said, I have a lot of stories to remember, and I just remembered one! I was on the bus on Thanksgiving (I think), and there was an Asian mother, father, and daughter sitting on the seats in front of where I was standing. The little girl got hungry so the mom takes out a bundle of rice wrapped in plastic wrap and hands her a clump of it! I just started laughing inside.... Rice is not only the worst travel food one can have, but I mean come on! How ridiculous is that? I mean it wasn't even just white rice, there was like rosemary or something in it. I understand if you just had some Chinese food leftovers or something, bu this was just a ball of rice in plastic wrap. I don't know, I just found that really weird. I can't stereotype 'cause I don't know if they were Chinese or Japanese or whatever, but I know us Russians would never take Пельмени as travel food! That's the best equivalent I could think of.... What do you think?